myself encore

My story involves huge moments of indecision that lasted for a nanosecond before I HAD to decide. It involves high alertness in unsafe spaces because no one thought to walk me home. It involves negotiating unilateral peace accords on my toes.

It means seeing a pandemic almost destroy the even distant forever after.. It means I'm just so exhausted. Brain body and soul and spirit. 

I'm just a person (admittedly also a woman) who thought "ooh ill be kind, that's good", or "what's he up to" *frownie face*. It's not rocket science in my opinion, like I actually teach it to people and they really grasp it.

Maaaybe a genius idea to conceive of, but everything else is I suppose designed to be contagious. 

Who do I turn to? Usually a dog. Humans have never quite grasped my problem to the same degree. My problem is "I don't know my problem, it makes me emotional and quiet and stupid about live fast die young, it makes me silly about saving and sad about success". People think "try going to Thailand", but I don't need to find myself that's not exactly the issue. Dogs say " put a turd somewhere like the eiffel tower". That just makes more sense to me, figuratively of course.